These days life is busy. fun-filled and meaningful though sometimes the mundane routine does get me a little impatient. But it is precisely the routine that brings me freedom of sort and the predictability does help settle the kids more.
After school, I'll make it a point to give Hannah her bath and shre snacks with her. It is then that we chat about her day. And yes, a 2 year old can say a lot... it is amazing. The other day, I couldn't help it but gave her a light smack on her buttocks as she was just wayyy tooo cute! :) (sometimes i like to pinch her cutie buns too!!!!!) hahah... and to my surprise she looked at me and said " I don't want mummy beat backside!". I thought it was funny.. and proceeded to ask why... she said " It's pain pain... cannot beat people!" I went... oops. sorry!
(I thought it was quite hilarious as it is quite candid of her to sound out ehr thoughts but actually they make sense too...)
Today she came back and again over a bowl of soup i asked Hannah about her day and what she did. She said " I (had)sandplay. xxx throw(with throwin action) the sand." ... I went oh no! Was the teacher angry? and Hannah said... " yes....Miss xxx said no no... xxx throw the sand at Hannah and Hannah cry...Hannah no more eyes and face... all sand"
I was shocked! I asked her if xxx threw sand in her face and she cried she said yes...
I am going to call her teacher.. not to ask if the sand did get into her face but to verify what she said and find out how well she can now convey a message:)
kids... it's amazing how they grow. I hope our snack time talk will last a long time to come. One day it will be, how's your day at work? or how's that bf of yours? or how's your kids!!! ...someday... but i guess the relationship starts now.
:)
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Sunday, March 27, 2011
In control
As a mummy I want to be in control of my child. Not that I want to reign over her and unslave her but I see the need for me to impose certain boundaries until she is grown.
I am sticky with TV time. With the many studies showing the detrimental effects TV have on kids I absolutely see no benefits for them to watch TV as a young baby. So we made it a rule. No TV before 2 years old. And with a lot ( i really mean a lot) of effort, we did not expose Hannah to TV for the first two years of her life. (at least not when she is at home and within our control). And as she passed two years of age, I believe she can watch but in a controlled environment. Means: Either daddy or mummy must be watching with her. To discuss what is seen on the screen so that there is interaction even though the eyes are glued on the screen. Means: there will be teaching at appropriate junctures. Means: Limited time. if 15 minutes is the given time, it has to be turned off when 15 minutes is up regardless of who is still in the middle of his sentence or which character is still dancing away.
I am sticky with manners. If she does not show respect even to the domestic helper, we make sure she is disciplined. She hits us, she gets it. She shows defiance, she gets it. She disobeys, she gets it. Yes, she is young and she is a child. But that does not mean she gets her way even when it is wrong. Yes we are strict and some may say overly strict and not flexible but I think parents who spare the rod and spoil the child will face a greater task as the child grows older.
I am sticky with reading. I understand that we should not force the child to read. we don't. But when she was few months old, she loves books. We read to her all the time. That was her favourite pasttime. Ours too. It has since become a bedtime routine. I must admit as she grows bigger there are more distraction...but I am glad we are still able to share a book each night. Being teachers we see the importance of her reading. The passion of it will make language learning easier for her. Also, reading is a good habit to cultivate as it calms her down for bedtime. And most of all, the time spent quietly on mummy or daddy's lap is magical.
Ok, time to feed Hannon. to be continued.
I am sticky with TV time. With the many studies showing the detrimental effects TV have on kids I absolutely see no benefits for them to watch TV as a young baby. So we made it a rule. No TV before 2 years old. And with a lot ( i really mean a lot) of effort, we did not expose Hannah to TV for the first two years of her life. (at least not when she is at home and within our control). And as she passed two years of age, I believe she can watch but in a controlled environment. Means: Either daddy or mummy must be watching with her. To discuss what is seen on the screen so that there is interaction even though the eyes are glued on the screen. Means: there will be teaching at appropriate junctures. Means: Limited time. if 15 minutes is the given time, it has to be turned off when 15 minutes is up regardless of who is still in the middle of his sentence or which character is still dancing away.
I am sticky with manners. If she does not show respect even to the domestic helper, we make sure she is disciplined. She hits us, she gets it. She shows defiance, she gets it. She disobeys, she gets it. Yes, she is young and she is a child. But that does not mean she gets her way even when it is wrong. Yes we are strict and some may say overly strict and not flexible but I think parents who spare the rod and spoil the child will face a greater task as the child grows older.
I am sticky with reading. I understand that we should not force the child to read. we don't. But when she was few months old, she loves books. We read to her all the time. That was her favourite pasttime. Ours too. It has since become a bedtime routine. I must admit as she grows bigger there are more distraction...but I am glad we are still able to share a book each night. Being teachers we see the importance of her reading. The passion of it will make language learning easier for her. Also, reading is a good habit to cultivate as it calms her down for bedtime. And most of all, the time spent quietly on mummy or daddy's lap is magical.
Ok, time to feed Hannon. to be continued.
Some updates
Things have been going on rather well for us. We're more or less into a routine already and thus some sanity at home.
Weekday routine:
715: dress up and get ready for the day
730: Hannon's first feed
800: Hannah wakes up for milk
830: Hannon naps and I take Hannah down to take her schoolbus
I then proceed with my morning fix of either: gym, coffee, chill.. me time basically
11am: Hannon's second feed
12: My lunch time
1230: Hannah's back from school Bathe and spend one to one time with her.
230: Hannah's nap time/ Hannon's third feed
330: Hannon's nap time
500: Hannah wakes and we go for a walk
600: Hannon's feed time
Then we are usually out and about till 9plus
Hannah sleeps at 10 and Hannon feeds right after Hannah sleeps
1030: Couple time and zzzzzzzzzzzz
Weekends.. is somewhat similar but with Hannah not in school it is more demanding and yeah i have no morning fix so I just bring Hannah out for breaky while hub goes for his American football game. OR we'll all have a family breaky while Hannon sleeps.
Next week i will be adjusting Hannon's routine to 3.5-4 hourly.
akan datang
Weekday routine:
715: dress up and get ready for the day
730: Hannon's first feed
800: Hannah wakes up for milk
830: Hannon naps and I take Hannah down to take her schoolbus
I then proceed with my morning fix of either: gym, coffee, chill.. me time basically
11am: Hannon's second feed
12: My lunch time
1230: Hannah's back from school Bathe and spend one to one time with her.
230: Hannah's nap time/ Hannon's third feed
330: Hannon's nap time
500: Hannah wakes and we go for a walk
600: Hannon's feed time
Then we are usually out and about till 9plus
Hannah sleeps at 10 and Hannon feeds right after Hannah sleeps
1030: Couple time and zzzzzzzzzzzz
Weekends.. is somewhat similar but with Hannah not in school it is more demanding and yeah i have no morning fix so I just bring Hannah out for breaky while hub goes for his American football game. OR we'll all have a family breaky while Hannon sleeps.
Next week i will be adjusting Hannon's routine to 3.5-4 hourly.
akan datang
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
All about me
The last time i seriously wrote an essay on this topic was... when I was... in primary one?! I remember writing on that broad-lined, brown jotter book. (That type of paper where you erase and the spot becomes black!) It was the typical, My name is... there are four members in my family... my father works as....my mother... my sister... I study in....
And twenty odd years down the road this simple essay though has not changed in its facts have certainly become much more enriched in content.
I am Jaslyn. I am married to a wonderful husband who happens to be my childhood (if you call 16 years old part of that) sweetheart. We practically grew up together in church as kids but only got to know each other in our teens. Somehow with myriad of events and his efforts to go after the (ahem~) popular girl, we got together. And me? I fell into the river of love and has been swimming in it since then.. sometimes drowning, sometimes floating and at times swimming along or against the current. I look forward to many more years of being in the river of love and whether or not i need a float or a swimming vest, I want to stay in it for the many years to come.
I am Jaslyn. I am a proud mother of two wonderful kids. My daughter, Hannah is now 25 months old. She is a cheeky bom bom. As much as pushing me to the edge of exploding in frustration with her terrible twos antics, I love her to bits. She is the cutest girl i've ever seen and she is my love. It is a joy to do things with her and seeing her grow never fails to amaze me. She is such great part of my life and has somehow stolen my heart in her secret ways. My son, Hannon is 2 months old. He is a fatty bom bom. He is so round I secretly harbour the fantasy of rolling him to see if he could do so! (shhh~) He is docile and charming in his own ways and most of the time for now he sleeps and feed and poo... but he is beginnning to notice my present and hey! he smiles and coos at me when i speak to him. I look forward to seeing him grow too. Wonder how life will be with two toddlers running wild!
I am Jaslyn. I am a teacher. Well, I am officially a teacher but am on leave. I still love my school and my job and teaching but I guess the time now is for me to spend the time with my own kids. I do, however, look forward to returning to where I left off from. Though i am uncertain when that day will be. It may be soon, it may take longer. But when my heart tells me so, I will follow it and move on. For now, head and heart says, Hannah and Hannon need mummy more.
I am Jaslyn. I am a person who has somehow grown to appreciate having few close friends to many aquaintances. I have come to realise that the number of people revolving around me is not of that great an importance. A few solid friends and a strong family support is all the network that keeps me going. Having said that, I am a peaceloving person. I cannot stand disharmony.Thus, I do not bear much of a grudge against anyone. However, being a woman and an emotional being, pain do linger on for a long time before it dissipates. I enjoy having friends who do not contact you only when they have an agenda in mind. I enjoy having freinds who are candid and speak their minds. I enjoy having friends who understands what I am going through or at least try to do so. I enjoy having friends who are, well, real. No pretense, no agenda. Just simplicity. Friends who share a cup of coffee because they simply enjoy your company. I am also a person who is very sticky to routine. I like things to stay in control and systematic. I like things to be calm and prepares everything in advance. But with two kids, I have learnt and is still learning to anticipate changes, embrace them and be spontaneous about things and life.
I am Jaslyn. I have dreams that are kept alive but most of the time I lack the passion to pursue them. I want to be able to conplete grade 8 piano. To travel around the world. To speak Spanish proficiently. To stay in a foreign country for a couple of years. To travel to another country on my own( short term lah~).To constantly look groomed and fashionable (this is hard work... it never fails to amaze me how anyone can put on their make-up, lenses with polished nails and nicely coordinated clothes, nicely permed hair, everytime they leave the house even to the market?!), to open my own stationary shop... and the list goes on
I am Jaslyn. I remember writing an essay on how much I love my grandma when I was in Primary two. I still love her to bits. She took care of me as a kid and I have been her blue eye girl since then! I remember how she piggy backed me to a clinic blocks away when I was sick before she finally stopped, panted and said :" bee, you walk on your own, ah ma is too tired already". We still meet up for meals occasionally and I make sure I hug her when I see her every Sunday. My grandma is getting older. And as much as it being so sombre to talk about it... i do wonder from time to time how life would be like when she finally leave us. I dread the day and I hope it will never come because when it does, i know my heart will be broken and I probably cry for a long time to come. So for now, I celebrate and thank God for each day that she is around. I cherish chatting with her on the phone. I cherish the meals we share. I look forward to bringing her out for shopping. I love her.
I am Jaslyn. There are so many facets of me and my life that I wish to go on. But the babies are awake. So I have to sign off. I wonder when I will write on this topic again. And when I do, will it be much mroe different from now?
I am Jaslyn. Today I am happy. I am contented with what I have and I find joy in what I do. I thank God for it all.
And twenty odd years down the road this simple essay though has not changed in its facts have certainly become much more enriched in content.
I am Jaslyn. I am married to a wonderful husband who happens to be my childhood (if you call 16 years old part of that) sweetheart. We practically grew up together in church as kids but only got to know each other in our teens. Somehow with myriad of events and his efforts to go after the (ahem~) popular girl, we got together. And me? I fell into the river of love and has been swimming in it since then.. sometimes drowning, sometimes floating and at times swimming along or against the current. I look forward to many more years of being in the river of love and whether or not i need a float or a swimming vest, I want to stay in it for the many years to come.
I am Jaslyn. I am a proud mother of two wonderful kids. My daughter, Hannah is now 25 months old. She is a cheeky bom bom. As much as pushing me to the edge of exploding in frustration with her terrible twos antics, I love her to bits. She is the cutest girl i've ever seen and she is my love. It is a joy to do things with her and seeing her grow never fails to amaze me. She is such great part of my life and has somehow stolen my heart in her secret ways. My son, Hannon is 2 months old. He is a fatty bom bom. He is so round I secretly harbour the fantasy of rolling him to see if he could do so! (shhh~) He is docile and charming in his own ways and most of the time for now he sleeps and feed and poo... but he is beginnning to notice my present and hey! he smiles and coos at me when i speak to him. I look forward to seeing him grow too. Wonder how life will be with two toddlers running wild!
I am Jaslyn. I am a teacher. Well, I am officially a teacher but am on leave. I still love my school and my job and teaching but I guess the time now is for me to spend the time with my own kids. I do, however, look forward to returning to where I left off from. Though i am uncertain when that day will be. It may be soon, it may take longer. But when my heart tells me so, I will follow it and move on. For now, head and heart says, Hannah and Hannon need mummy more.
I am Jaslyn. I am a person who has somehow grown to appreciate having few close friends to many aquaintances. I have come to realise that the number of people revolving around me is not of that great an importance. A few solid friends and a strong family support is all the network that keeps me going. Having said that, I am a peaceloving person. I cannot stand disharmony.Thus, I do not bear much of a grudge against anyone. However, being a woman and an emotional being, pain do linger on for a long time before it dissipates. I enjoy having friends who do not contact you only when they have an agenda in mind. I enjoy having freinds who are candid and speak their minds. I enjoy having friends who understands what I am going through or at least try to do so. I enjoy having friends who are, well, real. No pretense, no agenda. Just simplicity. Friends who share a cup of coffee because they simply enjoy your company. I am also a person who is very sticky to routine. I like things to stay in control and systematic. I like things to be calm and prepares everything in advance. But with two kids, I have learnt and is still learning to anticipate changes, embrace them and be spontaneous about things and life.
I am Jaslyn. I have dreams that are kept alive but most of the time I lack the passion to pursue them. I want to be able to conplete grade 8 piano. To travel around the world. To speak Spanish proficiently. To stay in a foreign country for a couple of years. To travel to another country on my own( short term lah~).To constantly look groomed and fashionable (this is hard work... it never fails to amaze me how anyone can put on their make-up, lenses with polished nails and nicely coordinated clothes, nicely permed hair, everytime they leave the house even to the market?!), to open my own stationary shop... and the list goes on
I am Jaslyn. I remember writing an essay on how much I love my grandma when I was in Primary two. I still love her to bits. She took care of me as a kid and I have been her blue eye girl since then! I remember how she piggy backed me to a clinic blocks away when I was sick before she finally stopped, panted and said :" bee, you walk on your own, ah ma is too tired already". We still meet up for meals occasionally and I make sure I hug her when I see her every Sunday. My grandma is getting older. And as much as it being so sombre to talk about it... i do wonder from time to time how life would be like when she finally leave us. I dread the day and I hope it will never come because when it does, i know my heart will be broken and I probably cry for a long time to come. So for now, I celebrate and thank God for each day that she is around. I cherish chatting with her on the phone. I cherish the meals we share. I look forward to bringing her out for shopping. I love her.
I am Jaslyn. There are so many facets of me and my life that I wish to go on. But the babies are awake. So I have to sign off. I wonder when I will write on this topic again. And when I do, will it be much mroe different from now?
I am Jaslyn. Today I am happy. I am contented with what I have and I find joy in what I do. I thank God for it all.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Workout time!!!
Why I love a good workout..
1) The perspiration makes me feel like I am going through a detox session.
2) I can feel the heart pumping and blood flowing telling me I am doing something good for the body.
3) I know I am one step closer to a better sculpt body.
4) I enjoy the company (of the PT, of hubby, of myself... whoever I work out with
5) It gives me a reason to get out of the house and go parkway:P
6)I enjoy the warm bath after that
7) The figures on the weighing machine -->a great motivation.
1) The perspiration makes me feel like I am going through a detox session.
2) I can feel the heart pumping and blood flowing telling me I am doing something good for the body.
3) I know I am one step closer to a better sculpt body.
4) I enjoy the company (of the PT, of hubby, of myself... whoever I work out with
5) It gives me a reason to get out of the house and go parkway:P
6)I enjoy the warm bath after that
7) The figures on the weighing machine -->a great motivation.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
The Birth Stories
I was looking through my older blog and found the entire story of how I delivered Hannah. I think it is only fair that Hannon's get recorded as well.
Hannah's story:
Alright, here's the story of LABOUR.
Well, some people said that labour could happen days before the real pushing and heaving. I guess that's the way for my case. About 5 days before the 'real thing', I went to the gynae for the normal check and he told me that I've dilated for about 2cm and IT could happen soon. That started us anticipating but in vain until 15th Feb, I had some show. I called the gynae and he told me to monitor. The time was close. Again nothing happened. We still went shopping cos I reckon hospital is nearer to Mt Alvernia anyway.
We went home and wondered when the real call would be. At 4.30am, I felt like I needed to pee and then I felt a huge gush coming on. I JUMPED out from bed. (something which I haven been able to do for months! I wonder where that surge of energy came from.) I stood rooted and started holding on to the towel which was already placed nicely beside me in preparation for this moment. I shouted for hubby to wake up. I just shouted, 'waters broke, Waters broke, how? I cannot walk!' He woke up and turned on the lights and asked me to just walk to the toilet although it meant that the water will leave a trail. I went to wash up while hubby mopped the floor. He showered and changed while I took a bottle of chicken essence. Then we made our way to the hospital.
Somehow there was this calmness after the initial shock. Total peace tinged with excitement. We made our way to the car and decided to drive through Mcdonald's for a quick bite before labour begins. Mum said that the contraction pain will only come after the waters have finished flowing so we thought that gives us some time to play around:P. We bought bf but I was gan jiong so could't eat much. so we shared a burger.
We arrived and checked into the delivery suite by 5.30am. Thank God for the perfect timing. Just one hour later there would have been heavy traffic. Just one hour later, hubby would have gone to school. Just one hour later, the pain would hvae come on.
6am- The contractions began. I managed to hold on for 3 hours. Tried using the laughing gas but it was rancid. I'd rather endure the pain than smell that cursed thing. My contractions was strong and steady. Unlke most people mine lasted one minute for every contraction although it was just 'early labour'.That probably contributed to the great pain and faster dilation I guess. When the gynae came and check, it was already dilated 5cm. And after 3 hours, I knew I just couldn't hang on to the end already. I knew my threshold was just a few more steps away. We discussed promptly and decided on the epidural. Epidural was PAINFUL. When the jab went through the spine, I let out an agonizing cry/scream/groan... I can't decide which. Hubby had to stand outside the room but he was right at the door assuring me that he's just there and he'll come back in once the procedure was done. I curled up and never for once felt so vulnerable and weak. I grabbed the bedsheets, buried my head and cried. The cursed medication took half an hour to take effect. That half an hour was bad. Thank God, the anaesthetic kicked in soon enough and we both slept like a baby for another 3 hours.
Gynae came by after three hours. We woke up. He checked and announced that I was 10cm dilated and ready for pushing. We were shock! That was really fast. Hubby said he needed to go toilet first! He rushed to the toilet while the nurses got me into position. Then the endless pushing came. They down the dosage of the epidural by half so that I could feel the contractions to aid pushing. I pushed for an hour with hubby supporting me and counting for me and the nurses cheering me on. It was very tiring and at the end of one hour the doc said I needed help. He decided to use the vacuum. He gave me some medication to up the contractions as well. This time round I began to move into sub- consciousness already. There was only one thing in my head. Push hard so that baby can come out naturally so that i do not need to undergo C-Sec. I saw a group of people surrounding me shouting in unison 'PUSH' and hubby's voice going 'deep breath in and push, 2,3,4 ,5,.6.....' Then someone said the head is out and hubby exclaimed, I can see the head! And with one hard push, something came out. I didn't know what... I just slumped back on the bed in a daze. Someone then threw a baby on my chest. I looked at the baby and I started crying very very hard. I guess it must be some kind of a relief to get her out.Hannah doesn't look too familiar too. I thought I would have laughed in joy but that was not the case. The stitching went on for almost an hour. I hear noise, heard baby crying, hubby talking to me.. nurses walking around. Then Gynae told the nurses to get ready for blood transfusion. Said that I lost a lot of blood. Then nurses asked if I've done that before and so on... I answered in a daze totally weakened by the entire process. Then just as I began to feel a lil' worried of what a blood transfusion may entail, the nurse came back with a report on my blood count and gynae mentioned that I am picking up very quickly so although my blood count was very low I can do without the transfusion. Thank God.
Baby was cleaned and brought to my breasts for feeding. Somehow she had the basic instinct as mentioned in the books that I read. She just suckled on after the nurse helped to latch her on. We took our first family portrait. With daddy in joy and happiness written all over his face. With Hannah's eyes closed, probably still oblivious that she's in the world now. With mummy pale as a ghost but trying to smile as brightly as possible so that she can look pretty. (vanity). The rest as they said, is history.
The story of labour. It is an experience that one can never imagine without having gone through it. That night, I smsed my mum to thank her for giving birth to me. I guess one has to go through the pain to understand that completely. The immensity of the entire experience is never overrated. It is a high price and great sacrifice. A mother's love.
Hannon's story:
Well... being a second time mother doesn't mean you do not anticipate when your contractions will start or if the waters will break. Somehow the waiting game is something so familiar yet unfamiliar. It is like something you experienced but not quite remember?
Anyway, I was 38 weeks. Went to the gynae and complaint to him about my terrible nights. Been having lower backache and 'contractions' for nights. Every night I wake up timing to see how far apart the contractions are. Then i will sit up thinking that I am going into labour soon. Then one hour later, everything stops! Gynae said I should be far from labour. Probably braxton hicks. But he decided to just check on me to see how far i've progressed since i've been complaining sooo much.
Guess what? I was already 2cm dilated. And guess what? He said : ' Actually if you want to, you can admit now and we can get your waters broken and you can deliver. If not you can wait... it will be next few days."
We went back of cos! How scary to admit straightaway there and then! Totally not prepared at all. Oh and on the same day he told us our baby would be big. At 40 weeks should be bigger than Hannah. (I was like, what?! Bigger than Hannah?! Hannah was 3.87kg! How much bigger... frightening)
Two nights in a row, I woke up same time, same ache, same story.
Finally I got frustrated with the lack of sleep. I woke Hub up and said " Let's go. Let's go in and get the waters broken and get this over once and for all!"
We went. Thinking that we can sleep after that.
Admitted... and realised things werem't that simple. Doc was not around in the wee hours (3am-4am) so they just had to monitor me until 7am... I was 3cm dilated by then.
7am... Doc came, said I was 4cm. Could break the waters or stay in the hospital and wait. Could not go home anymore...too dangerous as labour may set off anytime...
1pm, went to have waters broken. 1.15pm pain started. It was the familiar dull backache that I felt when I had hannah... I tried to distract myself by knitting! :) Each time contraction comes I would shout for hub and he would massage my back. Once it was over, I continued knittng and hub continued reading his Men's Health magazine (lol). It went on for a while... then the ache got more intense... and I threw the yarn aside and said ' Now it's very painful... the pain at the back, I could endure but due to the change in baby's position he was pressing downwards. It was like something sharp tearing me apart so that he could emerge. I was shocked because I had taken Epidural before I was at this stage for Hannah's delivery. Hub stood still and looked at me. He was at a lost too because his massage at the back could no longer work anymore and the pain then could not be eased by massage. I got worked up and asked him to just hug me. He did.
The nurse came and asked if I wanted Epidural, I said no but decided to try the gas....
Things were progressing really rapidly. Before I knew it, I was in agony and fear. Still I could not decide if I should take the Epidural. But finally gave in. I was in total distress, using the gas and clinging on to hub for dear life. The gas was not effective in removing the pain but somehow it tricked your mind to think that the pain is not there. There was one point when the contractions were so bad i took a really deep breath and I felt myself flying high... I was on cloud nine..literally!...totally HIGH but I was scared too because I thought I might just drift off and never return so i removed the mask and took in some oxygen again. The pain brought me back to reality. It was amidst this when one of the nurses said to my hub " Hello, your wife is not even using the gas!" It was then that we realised for the past, God knows how long, I had been clinging on the the mask that has been detached from the gas source! Goodness. In retrospect, I sure wonder if the effect of the gas is just psychological! I mean, I thought it was helping me lots when in actual fact I was holding on to a silly mask detached from the source!!! Hilarious lei!
And by the time they administered the Epidural and they checked on me, I was fully dilated.
And the best part, they said " Actually you can start pushing but since you just took the epidural, you can take a rest first la" Then the mid wife said " Better now right? Don't torture yourself."
I was kind of disappointed... if the midwife had told me to hang in there bec I was already fully dilated I would have delivered without epidural. I have gone that far...wasted.
I looked at the clock, 3 hours have gone by.
They really let us rest and in 20 minutes or so, the midwife returned alone. She sat before me and positioned me. Then she started to count and asked me to push. I was thinking... what? Just the 3 of us? When we were at MT A, it was a whole gang of cheerleaders who were shouting 'push!'..'push'... now it's one mid wide SAYing "ok, 1,2,3 push...'. faint.
Thankfully the gynae joined us soon. He came in and slapped me on the knee and said, "well-done! Very fast eh!" I was totally surprised to see how happy he looked. I remembered how distress he was when he was delivering Hannah. Perhaps this is a much easier birth, I thought.
And with a few pushes, Hannon was out!
Somehow I could see what was going on with the mirror on the lamp. It was fantastic to see Hannon's hair and with each push, I could see more of it. Then with the last surge of energy his round head emerged! But with the cord around his neck. I was so mesmerised by this cute little face that I forgot to panic even though the cord was around his neck. I witnessed the gynae telling the nurses to back away so that he could cut the cord and then there he was, Hannon was pulled up and placed on my chest. I teared. I was so touched. My baby who has been inside me for so long is finally out and he looked so adorable. I called him and he opened his eyes and looked towards me. :) My baby, Hannon Hoon Tian Yang weighing 3.37kg and 52cm long was born on 6 Jan 2011 at 1711hours.
We are proud parents of two.
Hannah's story:
Alright, here's the story of LABOUR.
Well, some people said that labour could happen days before the real pushing and heaving. I guess that's the way for my case. About 5 days before the 'real thing', I went to the gynae for the normal check and he told me that I've dilated for about 2cm and IT could happen soon. That started us anticipating but in vain until 15th Feb, I had some show. I called the gynae and he told me to monitor. The time was close. Again nothing happened. We still went shopping cos I reckon hospital is nearer to Mt Alvernia anyway.
We went home and wondered when the real call would be. At 4.30am, I felt like I needed to pee and then I felt a huge gush coming on. I JUMPED out from bed. (something which I haven been able to do for months! I wonder where that surge of energy came from.) I stood rooted and started holding on to the towel which was already placed nicely beside me in preparation for this moment. I shouted for hubby to wake up. I just shouted, 'waters broke, Waters broke, how? I cannot walk!' He woke up and turned on the lights and asked me to just walk to the toilet although it meant that the water will leave a trail. I went to wash up while hubby mopped the floor. He showered and changed while I took a bottle of chicken essence. Then we made our way to the hospital.
Somehow there was this calmness after the initial shock. Total peace tinged with excitement. We made our way to the car and decided to drive through Mcdonald's for a quick bite before labour begins. Mum said that the contraction pain will only come after the waters have finished flowing so we thought that gives us some time to play around:P. We bought bf but I was gan jiong so could't eat much. so we shared a burger.
We arrived and checked into the delivery suite by 5.30am. Thank God for the perfect timing. Just one hour later there would have been heavy traffic. Just one hour later, hubby would have gone to school. Just one hour later, the pain would hvae come on.
6am- The contractions began. I managed to hold on for 3 hours. Tried using the laughing gas but it was rancid. I'd rather endure the pain than smell that cursed thing. My contractions was strong and steady. Unlke most people mine lasted one minute for every contraction although it was just 'early labour'.That probably contributed to the great pain and faster dilation I guess. When the gynae came and check, it was already dilated 5cm. And after 3 hours, I knew I just couldn't hang on to the end already. I knew my threshold was just a few more steps away. We discussed promptly and decided on the epidural. Epidural was PAINFUL. When the jab went through the spine, I let out an agonizing cry/scream/groan... I can't decide which. Hubby had to stand outside the room but he was right at the door assuring me that he's just there and he'll come back in once the procedure was done. I curled up and never for once felt so vulnerable and weak. I grabbed the bedsheets, buried my head and cried. The cursed medication took half an hour to take effect. That half an hour was bad. Thank God, the anaesthetic kicked in soon enough and we both slept like a baby for another 3 hours.
Gynae came by after three hours. We woke up. He checked and announced that I was 10cm dilated and ready for pushing. We were shock! That was really fast. Hubby said he needed to go toilet first! He rushed to the toilet while the nurses got me into position. Then the endless pushing came. They down the dosage of the epidural by half so that I could feel the contractions to aid pushing. I pushed for an hour with hubby supporting me and counting for me and the nurses cheering me on. It was very tiring and at the end of one hour the doc said I needed help. He decided to use the vacuum. He gave me some medication to up the contractions as well. This time round I began to move into sub- consciousness already. There was only one thing in my head. Push hard so that baby can come out naturally so that i do not need to undergo C-Sec. I saw a group of people surrounding me shouting in unison 'PUSH' and hubby's voice going 'deep breath in and push, 2,3,4 ,5,.6.....' Then someone said the head is out and hubby exclaimed, I can see the head! And with one hard push, something came out. I didn't know what... I just slumped back on the bed in a daze. Someone then threw a baby on my chest. I looked at the baby and I started crying very very hard. I guess it must be some kind of a relief to get her out.Hannah doesn't look too familiar too. I thought I would have laughed in joy but that was not the case. The stitching went on for almost an hour. I hear noise, heard baby crying, hubby talking to me.. nurses walking around. Then Gynae told the nurses to get ready for blood transfusion. Said that I lost a lot of blood. Then nurses asked if I've done that before and so on... I answered in a daze totally weakened by the entire process. Then just as I began to feel a lil' worried of what a blood transfusion may entail, the nurse came back with a report on my blood count and gynae mentioned that I am picking up very quickly so although my blood count was very low I can do without the transfusion. Thank God.
Baby was cleaned and brought to my breasts for feeding. Somehow she had the basic instinct as mentioned in the books that I read. She just suckled on after the nurse helped to latch her on. We took our first family portrait. With daddy in joy and happiness written all over his face. With Hannah's eyes closed, probably still oblivious that she's in the world now. With mummy pale as a ghost but trying to smile as brightly as possible so that she can look pretty. (vanity). The rest as they said, is history.
The story of labour. It is an experience that one can never imagine without having gone through it. That night, I smsed my mum to thank her for giving birth to me. I guess one has to go through the pain to understand that completely. The immensity of the entire experience is never overrated. It is a high price and great sacrifice. A mother's love.
Hannon's story:
Well... being a second time mother doesn't mean you do not anticipate when your contractions will start or if the waters will break. Somehow the waiting game is something so familiar yet unfamiliar. It is like something you experienced but not quite remember?
Anyway, I was 38 weeks. Went to the gynae and complaint to him about my terrible nights. Been having lower backache and 'contractions' for nights. Every night I wake up timing to see how far apart the contractions are. Then i will sit up thinking that I am going into labour soon. Then one hour later, everything stops! Gynae said I should be far from labour. Probably braxton hicks. But he decided to just check on me to see how far i've progressed since i've been complaining sooo much.
Guess what? I was already 2cm dilated. And guess what? He said : ' Actually if you want to, you can admit now and we can get your waters broken and you can deliver. If not you can wait... it will be next few days."
We went back of cos! How scary to admit straightaway there and then! Totally not prepared at all. Oh and on the same day he told us our baby would be big. At 40 weeks should be bigger than Hannah. (I was like, what?! Bigger than Hannah?! Hannah was 3.87kg! How much bigger... frightening)
Two nights in a row, I woke up same time, same ache, same story.
Finally I got frustrated with the lack of sleep. I woke Hub up and said " Let's go. Let's go in and get the waters broken and get this over once and for all!"
We went. Thinking that we can sleep after that.
Admitted... and realised things werem't that simple. Doc was not around in the wee hours (3am-4am) so they just had to monitor me until 7am... I was 3cm dilated by then.
7am... Doc came, said I was 4cm. Could break the waters or stay in the hospital and wait. Could not go home anymore...too dangerous as labour may set off anytime...
1pm, went to have waters broken. 1.15pm pain started. It was the familiar dull backache that I felt when I had hannah... I tried to distract myself by knitting! :) Each time contraction comes I would shout for hub and he would massage my back. Once it was over, I continued knittng and hub continued reading his Men's Health magazine (lol). It went on for a while... then the ache got more intense... and I threw the yarn aside and said ' Now it's very painful... the pain at the back, I could endure but due to the change in baby's position he was pressing downwards. It was like something sharp tearing me apart so that he could emerge. I was shocked because I had taken Epidural before I was at this stage for Hannah's delivery. Hub stood still and looked at me. He was at a lost too because his massage at the back could no longer work anymore and the pain then could not be eased by massage. I got worked up and asked him to just hug me. He did.
The nurse came and asked if I wanted Epidural, I said no but decided to try the gas....
Things were progressing really rapidly. Before I knew it, I was in agony and fear. Still I could not decide if I should take the Epidural. But finally gave in. I was in total distress, using the gas and clinging on to hub for dear life. The gas was not effective in removing the pain but somehow it tricked your mind to think that the pain is not there. There was one point when the contractions were so bad i took a really deep breath and I felt myself flying high... I was on cloud nine..literally!...totally HIGH but I was scared too because I thought I might just drift off and never return so i removed the mask and took in some oxygen again. The pain brought me back to reality. It was amidst this when one of the nurses said to my hub " Hello, your wife is not even using the gas!" It was then that we realised for the past, God knows how long, I had been clinging on the the mask that has been detached from the gas source! Goodness. In retrospect, I sure wonder if the effect of the gas is just psychological! I mean, I thought it was helping me lots when in actual fact I was holding on to a silly mask detached from the source!!! Hilarious lei!
And by the time they administered the Epidural and they checked on me, I was fully dilated.
And the best part, they said " Actually you can start pushing but since you just took the epidural, you can take a rest first la" Then the mid wife said " Better now right? Don't torture yourself."
I was kind of disappointed... if the midwife had told me to hang in there bec I was already fully dilated I would have delivered without epidural. I have gone that far...wasted.
I looked at the clock, 3 hours have gone by.
They really let us rest and in 20 minutes or so, the midwife returned alone. She sat before me and positioned me. Then she started to count and asked me to push. I was thinking... what? Just the 3 of us? When we were at MT A, it was a whole gang of cheerleaders who were shouting 'push!'..'push'... now it's one mid wide SAYing "ok, 1,2,3 push...'. faint.
Thankfully the gynae joined us soon. He came in and slapped me on the knee and said, "well-done! Very fast eh!" I was totally surprised to see how happy he looked. I remembered how distress he was when he was delivering Hannah. Perhaps this is a much easier birth, I thought.
And with a few pushes, Hannon was out!
Somehow I could see what was going on with the mirror on the lamp. It was fantastic to see Hannon's hair and with each push, I could see more of it. Then with the last surge of energy his round head emerged! But with the cord around his neck. I was so mesmerised by this cute little face that I forgot to panic even though the cord was around his neck. I witnessed the gynae telling the nurses to back away so that he could cut the cord and then there he was, Hannon was pulled up and placed on my chest. I teared. I was so touched. My baby who has been inside me for so long is finally out and he looked so adorable. I called him and he opened his eyes and looked towards me. :) My baby, Hannon Hoon Tian Yang weighing 3.37kg and 52cm long was born on 6 Jan 2011 at 1711hours.
We are proud parents of two.
Bits and pieces
Funny list goes on:
1. Hannon pee onto his face while I was changing him. You see, I've been warned of how dangerous it is to change boys... so i always make sure his you-know-what aims towards anywhere but me. It so happened that it was towards his face that day and yes... it was powerful enough to give him a good morning face wash!
2.Hannah loves eavesdropping these days. She is like a sponge! I usually call hub by his pet name (xxx). That day Hannah wanted something from daddy so she went : Daddy! (no respond)...Daddy! (again no respond) This time loudly and she shouted xxx! I burst out laughing and daddy was like 'eh!That's only for mummy!. lol But my clever girl got her objective met.
Another instance we were talking about some ang mo... when she suddenly blurted out 'Ang Mo!'. hahahha
3. Funny faces...
4. Hannon's double chin
5. One day after Hannah's nap time was up I went into her room to wake her. To my amazement, she was already up but was quietly removing her rompers. She removed it from one sleeve to the next so when I saw her she was grinning at me topless!
Touching moments:
1. Hannah was very naughty. Refused to listen to my instructions. " Are you going to listen to mummy or not?!"
" mummy angry no. Mummy happy." And she did as she was told.
These days when she is naughty I'll just ask her " Do you want mummy to be angry?" She'll say no and she wants mummy to be happy and did as she's told. (disclaimer: not all the time la~)
2. I was so frustrated with sleepless nights and Hannah's misbehaviour. I smacked her and felt so upset that I had to do that and it pained me. I walked away from her and went to the sofa. She followed me. I went another way to my bed, sat down and teared. She climbed onto my bed, peered at me and said " mummy cry..." then she took a piece of tissue paper and started wiping my tears away. My heart melted. I hugged her and cried even more to her bewilderment. Then as if nothing has happened, she started laughing and running about again.
3. After confinement and months of not being able to carry Hannah she was surprised when I suddenly whipped her off her feet. She has been good. She understood I could not carry her when I was heavily pregnant. That moment on, she always says :" I want mummy bao bao."
Proud moments:
1. When Hannah was able to take schoolbus on her own after me going with her three times. She did not cry at all.
2. Hannah knows the different colours after I taught her. (red, yellow, brown, black, white, pink, purple, orange, red, blue, green)
3.Hannah knows the sounds of the following: a,b,c,h,m,o,s,t, after I taught her
4. Hannah learnt to sit, to crawl, to walk, to run, to jump... And I was there at every phase.
5. Hannah's speech development. From blabber, from single syllable to two and now three and four. Now she can speak in an almost proper sentence: Cat is not here. Cat is there... Daddy went buy food for mummy... mummy where?... I want water... I want feel/try/smell/touch/see... I want carry didi....
6. Hannah getting more sociable.
7. Hannah loves Hannon.
8. Hannon extending his sleep time and learnng to sleep without being rocked or without being nursed to sleep.
Happy moments:
All of the above.
Angry moments:
Happen everyday too... better not mention them... in gist, the terrible TWOs... brushing the teeth and eating can be a pain in the xxx!
1. Hannon pee onto his face while I was changing him. You see, I've been warned of how dangerous it is to change boys... so i always make sure his you-know-what aims towards anywhere but me. It so happened that it was towards his face that day and yes... it was powerful enough to give him a good morning face wash!
2.Hannah loves eavesdropping these days. She is like a sponge! I usually call hub by his pet name (xxx). That day Hannah wanted something from daddy so she went : Daddy! (no respond)...Daddy! (again no respond) This time loudly and she shouted xxx! I burst out laughing and daddy was like 'eh!That's only for mummy!. lol But my clever girl got her objective met.
Another instance we were talking about some ang mo... when she suddenly blurted out 'Ang Mo!'. hahahha
3. Funny faces...
4. Hannon's double chin
5. One day after Hannah's nap time was up I went into her room to wake her. To my amazement, she was already up but was quietly removing her rompers. She removed it from one sleeve to the next so when I saw her she was grinning at me topless!
Touching moments:
1. Hannah was very naughty. Refused to listen to my instructions. " Are you going to listen to mummy or not?!"
" mummy angry no. Mummy happy." And she did as she was told.
These days when she is naughty I'll just ask her " Do you want mummy to be angry?" She'll say no and she wants mummy to be happy and did as she's told. (disclaimer: not all the time la~)
2. I was so frustrated with sleepless nights and Hannah's misbehaviour. I smacked her and felt so upset that I had to do that and it pained me. I walked away from her and went to the sofa. She followed me. I went another way to my bed, sat down and teared. She climbed onto my bed, peered at me and said " mummy cry..." then she took a piece of tissue paper and started wiping my tears away. My heart melted. I hugged her and cried even more to her bewilderment. Then as if nothing has happened, she started laughing and running about again.
3. After confinement and months of not being able to carry Hannah she was surprised when I suddenly whipped her off her feet. She has been good. She understood I could not carry her when I was heavily pregnant. That moment on, she always says :" I want mummy bao bao."
Proud moments:
1. When Hannah was able to take schoolbus on her own after me going with her three times. She did not cry at all.
2. Hannah knows the different colours after I taught her. (red, yellow, brown, black, white, pink, purple, orange, red, blue, green)
3.Hannah knows the sounds of the following: a,b,c,h,m,o,s,t, after I taught her
4. Hannah learnt to sit, to crawl, to walk, to run, to jump... And I was there at every phase.
5. Hannah's speech development. From blabber, from single syllable to two and now three and four. Now she can speak in an almost proper sentence: Cat is not here. Cat is there... Daddy went buy food for mummy... mummy where?... I want water... I want feel/try/smell/touch/see... I want carry didi....
6. Hannah getting more sociable.
7. Hannah loves Hannon.
8. Hannon extending his sleep time and learnng to sleep without being rocked or without being nursed to sleep.
Happy moments:
All of the above.
Angry moments:
Happen everyday too... better not mention them... in gist, the terrible TWOs... brushing the teeth and eating can be a pain in the xxx!
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